Archive for the ‘Life with Boys’ Category

KEEPING TEEN BRAINS ACTIVE

Monday, March 16th, 2020

Well, it arrived. The first Monday of a 6-week school closure. Last Thursday, as we absorbed the idea of having kids home for weeks on end, parents went into full panic mode. I say that with love and compassion. I know this comes from a place of love and a need to have some semblance of control. I totally get it! Friends on social media started posting their homeschooling weekly lesson plans. Again, I get it… but I had to smile. You need to consider recreating school at home is impossible. Your kitchen table is not the classroom and YOU are not their teacher. (Even if that is your profession!) My advice: Be creative and give your kids choice. This is the perfect time to show kids that we never stop learning and you don’t need a classroom to expand your mind.

Be Creative

Think of this as a time for your kids to do all those amazing things they LOVE (or could love) to do or have interest in, but don’t have any time to do it because of the rigorous academics they navigate everyday.

Do they sing or play an instrument? Learn a new song or piece. Write a song and record it. Create a video and send it to a loved one that you can’t see right now or post to YouTube

Do they love visual arts? Draw, paint, collage, etc, etc,? Not an artist? Use YouTube to challenge them. Try these tutorials for easy how-to videos channels: Happy Drawings and Draw So Cute.

Create a journal or Vlog that documents COVID-19 and their weeks at home. They are literally living in history right now! This is something that future generations will learn about. Record history. Report on the news, events and what they are doing!

Write a short story, graphic novel, poems. Students rarely get a chance to write for enjoyment. This is the perfect time! Need a story starter? This site will help you generate a first line.

Read a book/Watch a movie. This list is an awesome resource. If you can, buy from a local bookstore, many are delivering right to your door.

Visit a virtual museum. Here are some lists that have been already created. List 1/ List 2 / Google Arts & Culture

Watch a TED-Talk. Here are the 25 Most Popular TED-Talks.

Life Skills:

Let’s be honest. Many of our teens are lacking in the life skill department. Sooner then later (we hope) they will be launching from our nest and they need to be a bit savvy in the ways of the world. Big W is going to study for his written driver’s test and Little Man is going to take the online course for his boater’s license.

Learn to cook a meal or bake a treat. Have them pick a favorite meal or look through the many cookbooks you have and never use! Treats are always a great motivator. Who doesn’t love a cookie or a tart?

Create a list of home projects that need to get done. If you don’t know how to do it, harness the power of YouTube. Believe me, there is a how – to video on anything you need done around your house.

Learn to wash, fold, and put away your own clothes!

Go for a drive. For my “almost” licensed driver, this is a great activity. Put a destination into Google Maps and away we go!

Give Them Choice

Teen life has been turned upside down and they are not happy about it! They may be disgruntled and nasty. Giving them reasonable choices throughout the day will make this time be a little less horrible for them. Although it’s hard to believe right now, life will return to normal. Until then, involve your teen in brainstorming activities that they will “buy” into and make the best of this strange time together.

Let’s crowdsource our ideas. Add any additional activities/ideas/sources of inspiration and I will update the post regularly! Be well. Spread kindness.

FOR THE LOVE OF BOYS

Friday, March 9th, 2018

It is no secret I have a soft spot for boys.  I’m a mother to two amazing creatures of the boy variety.  I have always taken the charge of raising them into good men extremely seriously. When they were little, I would fixate on toddler and preschool behaviors and strongly believe I was completely failing them (and society).  Honestly, boys under the age of 8 are often little monsters …at least mine were.  So far we are doing OK, but the stakes get higher as they get older and that is sometimes overwhelming.

Over the last week New York magazine has featured a series How to Raise a Boy.  I have been transfixed.  Pouring over each article like a text book. Topics including aggression, emotions, baseball, sex, porn, sexual assault and consent.  I was so inspired reading the series, I asked our local bookstore to get the paper edition of New York magazine.  If you are mother of boys, put aside time to read and absorb. Truly, it’s that good.  If you are mother to girls, I ask that you read a few of the articles.  Boys often get a real bad rap but are dealing with situations that are foreign to us as women.  No doubt the my boys and your girls are going to eventually interact and it is helpful to be empathetic to the challenges all children face in the modern age.

We all want the absolute best for our children.  Being open to conversations that we may find uncomfortable might be the pathway to understanding their world.  My hope is that we are still in this together.

PS// My life with boys is pretty darn amazing and I wouldn’t have it any other way!

 

 

READ ALOUD TO OLDER CHILDREN

Monday, January 22nd, 2018

 

The days of my boys being small enough to curl up in my lap for story time have long past.  Board books, we literally have memorized, are a thing of the past.  However, I still read to my kids and I encourage anyone with older kids to do the same.  My teenager is an avid reader, but he loves story telling of any kind.  My youngest is a reluctant reader.  He does not read by choice and prefers graphic novels over any other text.  I choose books I know they will both enjoy or that I want them to experience.  They also ask for titles they are interested in hearing.  We try to read nightly during the school week.  It is the perfect opportunity to enjoy each other’s company late in the evening.  No screens and a shared experience.  Cozy moments don’t come as often anymore, so I trick them into being close when we read.  Shhhh, don’t tell them!

Here are a few ideas to consider while selecting titles:

1 |  Read a classic.  A few titles we have enjoyed:  The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, A Cricket in Times Square, Where the Red Fern Grows.

2|   Read a book before the movie is released.  We finished reading A Wrinkle in Time and just started Ready Player One.

3|   Read a book full of action.  We loved Hatchet!

4|   Listen to an audio book together.  Perfect on long road trips.  Try a funny title such as The Twits, The Minpins and The Magic Finger,

5|  Read a book that contains themes and plot lines that are better read together. Consider the refuge story, A Long Walk to Water.

Image by Tom Hermans on Unsplash

 

TWEEN UNIFORM: BLACK ON BLACK

Thursday, January 11th, 2018

Other than this, Little Man only had one other item on his wish list in December.  A motto jacket.  It literally came out of the blue and was completely unexpected.  He continued to ask for it, so on Christmas morning he found this sweet jacket under the tree.

After careful consideration of his current wardrobe, he decided he had nothing to wear with it. For the last 3 years he was worn the same thing everyday: basketball shorts, a short sleeve t-shirt and zip hoodie.  He has now created a new uniform for himself.  Black on black on black.  He requested new black jeans and ALL black shirts.  (Thank you, Old Navy.)  The black Vans were a birthday present, which happens to fall 4 days after Christmas.  Without fail he has worn a version of this uniform since New Year’s Day.  The kid is strong on commitment.

If I was his stylist- I would add a dark green beanie, for a little splash of color, and these awesome spectacles.

We shall see how long this lasts, but for now it’s pretty fantastic.

 

CONNECT WITH YOUR TEEN THROUGH BOOKS

Wednesday, September 13th, 2017

a reading list

Permit me to totally geek out over a book list.  It might be the English Lit major in me, but man I’m excited about my 8th grader’s reading list for the year.  Last night was our curriculum night and his teachers shared the titles he will be reading this year.  The anchor document that his Language Arts teacher is using for the entire year is the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.  Ya, things have come a long way since I was in 8th grade.  I was totally impressed!  Without hesitation, I decided to read all of them too.  (Yep, there’s the book nerd in me!)  Hopefully it will be a way to talk about school and life in a non-evasive way.  One must tread lightly with teens!  In the very least, I will know the topics he is discussing at school.  As school kicks into high gear, consider reading the books on your child’s required reading list.

the required reading:

books 1books 2

 

DEAR BOYS: A LETTER ON THE FIRST DAY

Thursday, August 31st, 2017

dear boys | WHERE IS JUNE?

Dear boys,

Our summer came to an abrupt end this morning.  After weeks of sun and friends and freedom, you face weeks of structure, work and responsibility.  As I tasked you in organizing your backpacks, charging your iPad, packing your lunch and finding a book- I realized how much we have grown. Obviously you have physically grown, but the maturity that is emerging is astonishing to me.  You are becoming self-sufficient young men in front of my eyes.  I have learned to literally “chill out” and continually try to NOT sweat the small stuff.  (I didn’t even make Henry change his stained t-shirt this morning.  I’m showing great progress.)

When I think about what I want for you this year, my list is simple.  I want you to be yourselves.  That’s it.  I feel like the rest of the stuff is working itself out.  You are learning to be trustworthy.  You are both reasonably kind people.  For the most part, people enjoy your company.  You occasionally eat a vegetable.  I love you for the unique beings you are.  Keep on being weird, stubborn, caring, fiery, funny and unpredictable.  My promise is to guide you and not try and change you.  I’ll support you in your passions-even if I don’t get it.  Your dad and I are lucky to be on this ride with you.  Although we may annoy you, we are your biggest fans. Always.

As you charge into 5th and 8th grade, try to keep it together.  If you fall flat on your face, I will help you pick up your yard sale.  And I will also do your laundry every once in awhile.

Have a great day 2. Love, Mom

 

A TEENAGER IN THE HOUSE

Wednesday, June 21st, 2017

teenager in the house

Today marks 13 years of being a mother.  It actually seems astonishing to me, but then I look at pictures and it is all too real.  My Will was the sweetest and happiest baby on the block.  With his blond curls and killer blue eyes, I was smitten from minute one.  There was something reassuring about those early days.  Lucky for me I didn’t have any postpartum depression or sadness.  It was actually quite the opposite.  I instantly loved every part of having a baby and felt confident as a mother.

Then Will became a toddler and a pre-schooler.  All of my conceptions that I was “doing it right”, that I so naively assumed when he was tiny, were thrown out the window!  To say he was a spirited child is a complete understatement.  I read every book, tried every strategy and cried and yelled a ton!  He was so darn cute and inquisitive, but never easy.  I would later learn that many of our battles were directly related to ADHD, but at the time I was just a horribly ineffective mother (or so I believed).  Adding Henry to the mix upped the ante.  I had become a mom to two ridiculously over-active boys and I was outmatched on a daily basis.

Will has grown into an amazing young man.  He is passionate and fun-loving.  I have never met anyone so willing to try new things without trepidation.  His interests are alternative and that is 100% awesome!  I don’t particularly love Star Trek, but I listen intently to all of his factoids.  Our path together has been anything but straight. But he is hitting his stride and has matured in ways I didn’t think possible even a year ago!

I’m not sad that he is turning 13 because he is so pleased about getting older.  Don’t you remember that feeling?   However, I am keenly aware that our precious time together under one roof is ebbing.  He is finding independence and needing me less and less.  Proud to be his mom doesn’t even come close to describing how I feel.  I cannot wait to see what lies ahead for this beautiful creature.  I am the lucky one!

 

MOTHERING MANTRA: RAISING CAPABLE HUMANS

Wednesday, September 14th, 2016

capable humans |Where is June?

Everyone needs a mantra, right?  That might be a bit of a stretch, but I love it when someone tells me they have a personal mantra.  While mantras are usually focused on one’s self, my new mantra is focused on parenting.  My “mothering” to be specific.  As we embark on a new school year, I have adopted a simple but powerful mantra:  I am raising capable humans.  (At least that is the goal!)

As a mother who does not work outside my home, this guiding principle isn’t so simple after all.  My job is actually… my kids.   My kids and running my house while trying to maintain some semblance of sanity. When your kids are your work, you can get a little crazed.  I take my boys’ shortcomings, struggles, and idiosyncracies very personal.  I feel it all to my core.  After a particularly difficult school year, I came to painfully realize this is 100% unhealthy.  It isn’t good for me and it certainly isn’t good for them.  They are humans, and although I am on the journey with them, it is their journey after all.

These boys do amazing things all of the time.  They are capable of climbing rock walls, skiing black diamonds, making stop motion videos, and popping up on surf boards.  If this is true, then they are also capable of making mac n’ cheese, managing their homework, asking a teacher for help, and doing their own laundry.  Of course I will advocate for them and help them when they need it.  I love them fiercely!  I just need to remind myself that I don’t need to DO for them all of the time.  In my teens, my dad used to say the funniest thing.  He would tell me, “I’ve done my job if you want to move out.”  I totally get it now.  Independent children ready and eager to take on the world is the end game.  The first step is just getting out of the way.  Simple, but not easy.

What do you think of personal mantras?  Am I just taking my crazy in a different direction?

 

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HEDBANZ – A HOLIDAY EDITION

Thursday, December 17th, 2015

headbanz holiday edition | Where is June?

We are once again hosting a holiday meal on Christmas Eve for our family.  Every year I try to think of a new idea to keep the cousins on their toes.  When they were really little I covered the entire table with kraft paper and left cups of crayons out for them.  They aren’t so little anymore {plus my boys never colored}, but they do love to laugh together. This year we are going to play a holiday edition of Hedbanz.  If you aren’t familiar with the game, each player wears a headband and tries to guess the card on his or her forehead.  We will use the blue headbands but the “playing cards” will be holiday themed.  I will brainstorm people, places and objects associated with winter and Christmas. A few I have thought of so far: Santa, Frosty, candy canes, Christmas tree, North Pole, stockings, hot cocoa, Rudolph, the Grinch, Cindy Lou Who.  Can you think of any others?

Keeping with the holiday theme, I plan to write the words on gift tags.  {That is very OCD of me and is certainly not necessary!}  Kids and adults love the original version of this game, so I hope it will be a big hit!   With a few cocktails it should make for great fun.

santa headbanz holiday edition | Where is June?

A few nights ago the boys were sweet enough to model for me and then we played a few rounds.  Little Man wasn’t too thrilled about being a Unicorn.  I was very comfortable with my hot dog persona.

headbanz | Where is June?

We are looking forward to an evening filled with laughter.  What games do you like to play with your family during the holidays?  I would love to hear!

GUYS READ [THE FLYING BEAVER BROTHERS]

Monday, October 19th, 2015

guys read | flying beaver brothers | Where is June?

Little Man’s love for graphic novels has been well documented.  {Read about other graphic novel series here and here.}   They are engaging, easy to read, and fun.  He has been reading the series The Flying Beaver Brothers by Maxwell Eaton III for quite some time.  He has actually read and re-read each title over and over and over.

Brothers Ace and Bub make him giggle.  Ace loves extreme sports and is always looking for a new adventure. Bub loves napping and, well, napping.  Each new book finds them on a new adventure.  The illustrations are fantastic, the colors simple, and the dialogue is snappy.  Little Man devours these books and anxiously awaits the next title to be released.  Give this series a try!  I bet your kids love it.

The Flying Beaver Brothers is targeted for kids in grades 1-4, but Big W thinks they are hilarious as well.  They are a crowd-pleaser!

Reading for enjoyment is so important for young children.  There is no way to convey how strongly I feel about this topic.  Please allow your kids to have fun with books.  Never mind the mom who is bragging about her three year old reading chapter books.  Forget about the labels they may or may not have put on your child at school.  The goal should be building life long readers.  Whether your child is reading chapter books, comic books, graphic novels, non-fiction titles or poetry, the important thing is that he or she is reading.  Simple but true.  Let them enjoy books and have fun helping them find books they love.

 

Where is June?

 

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